Homers Biography
by mikamike
Summary: Homers point of view on his life.
1. my life with my family

INTRODUCTION  
  
My name is Homer J. Simpson. I have a fasinating life and love every minute of it except for the ones I hate like talking with Flanders or not drinking some beer for a few seconds. I wanted to write a little bit about my struggles, my children, wife, and friends. So sit back drink a cold one and enjoy.  
  
MY CHILDHOOD  
  
I had a troublesome childhood. My mom had to be a fugitive so I didn't see her so much throughout my life. I had many sad times but could always rely on my friends Lenny, Carl, and Mo. My father usually never had an ounce of sympathy. I had other disencouraging people and stuff in my childhood like Fatoney and seeing a dead corpse which I now know was Smithers Sr. Even though I was exposed to many hippee related stuff I still remaine sane and I don't find myself doing stuff like tickling stray cats or starting protests against achoholic coffee.  
  
MARGE  
  
Marge. She is the gem of my world. She and I had three beautiful. Marge is so forgiving even after I do stuff like marry Vegas women. She is unlike any women because of her looks sensitivity and the fact she belongs to me. I don't kno what I would do without her. Actually I do I would sell Bart and donate Lisa to science every month or so. I love Marge so much.  
  
BART  
  
Bart is my oldest child and my only son. Bart thinks that I am an idiot and extremely obbeist .He thiks so highly of me. I know I do bad stuff to him which makes me angry so to blow off the steam I choke him. You should see all the stuff my little prankster does. Even though he get s me angry I love him. And if anyone says that sounds weird I'll hunt you down. I will!  
  
LISA  
  
Lisa is 8 but is very intelligent like her father. She must have an IQ around 5 or 9 like her dad. She is always ready to go to foreign contries like Brazil or China Town. She is my oldest daughter and I can rely on her to babysitt my youngest daughter and her older brother. I always want to be closer to her even if it takes highering detectives or other drastic measures.  
  
MAGGIE  
  
Maggie or the forgotten simpson is my youngest daughter and child. She is very unique though like the fact her clothes are attached to her socks and that she had 6 letters in her name. She doesn't talk so technicly mute, but that's okay. I always try to get close to her. She actually once saved my life and that proves how special she really is. I,m going to go get a beer. Bye 


	2. My friends and other people

Lenny  
  
Lenny. Lenny was a great friend to me ever since I was a kid. He helped from when I got a splinter, inhaled a crayon all life's little bumps and bruises. We have a lot in common like our addiction to beer and people with extra body parts. I can always trust him for a good game of bowling or just to lean on when I have to sleep and Marge doesn't allow me to sleep in our house.  
  
Carl  
  
Carl is a co-worker, friend, substitute Lenny, and member of my old long gone gang. I can always count on him to feed me beer through pipes like those teenagers do in Cancun. He is the only person I am not prejudice against even though he's different. From singing Mr. Sandman on a railroad to getting madly drunk and trashing my children's school I can trust on Carl for a good time and possibly a throbbing headache.  
  
Mo  
  
Ah the all-loyal dispenser of beer. I can always trust him even though he's held me at gunpoint over 10 times. I always can trust on Mo even ever since I was a kid I consider him my life partner. I can trust him from hurting Fatoney when I was a kid to helping me solve my problems  
  
Mr. Flanders  
  
He is a holy pain in the butt. He has good taste in women though. Now he dates a country/gospel singer ever since Maude died (It wasn't my fault). Even though he bothers me I help him with problems. He no longer cuts loose since he's around 50 and the last time he did we married to girls in Nevada. That's not m fault either.  
  
Rod  
  
Flanders's oldest son. His role model is his dad (poor kid)  
  
Todd  
Mr. Flanders's youngest son. Imagine how innocent he acts. Bart only once made him crazy and I once caught him watching Lisa bathe so he has a little bad in him.  
  
Apu  
  
Apu is the main-man at the Quickie-Mart. He has a wife named Manjula who he was forced by his mother to marry, but he didn't care because it was love at first sight. Me, Marge, Bart, and him gave Manjula stuff that was responsible for their octuplets that she had  
  
Manjula  
Apu's loving wife, mother of 8 


End file.
